Being a homemaker

By Fayezah Iqbal

With all due respect to our mothers, and grandmothers, a homemaker is an institution that’s full of power and heritage and one can’t understand the role until one becomes one. An Indian homemaker is typically known to manage a home untiringly without much fuss and with single-minded devotion and whole-hearted dedication to their families. Even if she is a working woman, her duties at home are not compromised or fully delegated to domestic help, let alone her husband.

A homemaker is considered to be a selfless lot ever ready to depart from her share of things, someone who has to prioritise others over herself and be super organised, super sorted and magically remain composed and cheerful ever. Close to this perception of a homemaker, I assessed my first-time experiences as one. No wonder, it’s rightly considered an applauded job. Being a homemaker means being a directory of the positions and locations of stuff arranged and stacked throughout the house. As a homemaker, one gradually transitions to becoming an encyclopaedia of small to big to medium home remedial measures, whether it’s removing turmeric stains on a white cloth or removing suntan on a recently tanned complexion.

In the due course of time, a homemaker also becomes a living repository of quick tips, knick-knacks and easy hacks. The list could range anywhere from fixing an excessively salty Sabzi curry to ironing clothes without an iron. Or it could be as mundane as preparing non-oily and super tasty food or giving a parlour-like glow with a DIY face pack.

Sorting and organising is just another department for a homemaker that takes its individual space and time. A homemaker learns to master the art of neatly sorting every piece of stuff according to their priority and usage and organising it like a breeze. From a tiny safety pin to stationery to clothes to big equipment, everything seamlessly falls into its assigned places in perfect harmony as if it belonged there. And so it’s understandable, that a slight messiness in this set-up that disturbs this harmony can ruffle up the homemaker too!

In the list of chores and roles, cooking is an important one, which is sometimes projected as the only chore performed by a homemaker. Nevertheless, cooking does take some hours of the day. The most difficult part of cooking is not preparing food but deciding the menu every day for each meal. Cooking too can become a taxing and monotonous job, for the newbies especially as one starts waking up at the earliest and pushing oneself to cook breakfast. A homemaker does not mind, learning a diverse palate of recipes no matter how impossible it seems.

Guarding money, and precious items and keeping a close eye on the whereabouts of home also comes naturally to a homemaker. Performing diverse roles and odd jobs just blends in with the job profile of a homemaker. These include delivering the functions of a wife, mother, daughter-in-law and aunt and prioritising each role with due importance. Not to mention, a homemaker is expected to be ever gracious and welcoming to all and sundry in the family, close and afar.

Last, but not least, a homemaker is often considered an epitome of kindness, selflessness and perfection. Rightly so. She imbibes all these virtues in her long journey, not just bound by any imposed duty or familial responsibility, but also through unconditional love and care for her husband, children and further parents-in-law. This responsibility-laden love starts manifesting in various forms in a homemaker. By being patient and keeping calm when she is criticised for her food and chores. By being selfless enough to eat less or forego a certain food item she likes if another member wants it. By striving to be perfect enough to consistently deliver her duties without fail, unaffected by anybody’s perception of her. By being forgiving to those who carelessly leave the stuff disorganised, and do not care to maintain the tidiness. For instance, letting go of those members who forget to keep their shoes out of the home or changing slippers while going to the loo. By teaching her children and all others to nurture their loved ones and uphold the family ties firmly without expecting anything in return.

Her job of managing and caring for her family constantly shapes her into this super-woman, called a homemaker.

Bio:
Fayezah Iqbal is currently pursuing Ph.D. from Patna University. She completed Masters in Spanish from JNU, New Delhi. In her research, she is interested in exploring the lesser revealed aspects of history through the lens of historical fiction that could open avenues for reconsidering and rethinking about the current politico-social narratives. She has been contributing articles regularly to magazines, both print and online.

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